Screw Off!

On August 10, 1889 an Englishman called Dan Rylands patented the screw cap. It took nearly 120 years, but the invention is finally gaining respect in the wine world, particularly in Australia and New Zealand. This is one instance, at least to me, where it’s good to get screwed. No dicking around with a corkscrew and cutter, and on the off chance there’s wine left in the bottle it’s a simple matter to close the bottle for polishing off the next day.

D’Arenberg, one of my favorite wineries across the board, has made the move to screw caps on most of their bottlings. Although not on their “Icon” wines: The Dead Arm, The Coppermine Road and The Ironstone Pressings. As serious, world-class wines I guess they‘re compelled to keep with the tradition of the cork, besides which these wines are meant to lay down and the cork is an important tool to verify that the wine has been properly stored.

I had the happy occasion to break open a 2004 Dead Arm last night (thanks Benamatt), as a complement to some massively thick rib eyes. This wine is, in a word, outrageous. Rich, deep, regal purple, with a massive nose of spicy blueberry. Robert Palmer raved about this wine, but he described it as tannic. I don’t know when he reviewed it, but a mere 3 years after bottling – as young as you’d ever want to drink it – the tannins subsided significantly. The texture was like liquid velvet. The taste was a complex blend of mocha, vanilla, blackberry and maybe even a bit of chocolate. Unlike some other D’Arenberg Shiraz, this wine was not at all peppery. Maybe a bit of earth or tobacco, but the general impression is a juicy smoothness that just tastes and feels soothing. A superb wine, and a perfect match to the ribeyes.

Not cheap at around $60, but I’m tempted to call it a bargain because it’s that good. They didn't screw around with this one.

Gross Taste In Food Leads Nixon to Resign

On August 9, 1974 Richard Nixon's resignation took effect, having formally resigned in a speech the prior evening. As a pre-teen, this wasn’t a particularly important event for me but it was obviously a momentous event in American history. As I learned more about Nixon in subsequent years I found him to be a very intriguing guy. He said “I'm glad I'm not Brezhnev. Being the Russian leader in the Kremlin, you never know if someone's tape recording what you say” and then proceeded to destroy his presidency by taping himself. He said “I have no enemies in the press” but told the press “you won’t have Nixon to kick around anymore”. He inspired such a level of scorn that Kennedy said "Do you realize the responsibility I carry? I'm the only person standing between Richard Nixon and the White House," and Truman said “Nixon is a shifty-eyed goddamn liar. . . . .He's one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides;” yet who also inspired Governor Ahhhnold to become a Republican. And he's a guy who’s favorite lunch was cottage cheese with ketchup on it.

That is, in a word, gross. I mean cottage cheese isn’t particularly appetizing in the first place. Even if adding ketchup improved the taste, the look, texture and idea is just too awful to even try. Personally, I think ketchup is an absolutely necessity for a few select uses: a condiment for burgers, fries and onion rings, a base for BBQ sauces if you don’t feel like starting completely from scratch, and as an occasional use to spice up some other sauces. The only ketchup to use of course is Heinz. However, like Coke, most ketchup including Heinz is loaded with our old friend High Fructose Corn Syrup.

What's the alternative? Banana sauce. It tastes amazingly similar to ketchup, which is somewhat startling since it's not particularly easy to confuse the taste of tomatoes and bananas. Of course ketchup was originally a Chinese condiment made from anchovies, and when it became popular in the West in England it was made from mushrooms. So there's a lot of latitude here. Like regular tomato ketchup, banana sauce varies considerably in taste between brands. Every one I've seen uses real sugar - although in some cases like the Jufran here there's also a bevy of artificial colors and preservatives. Jufran isn't a favorite, but it's what they had the last time I needed it in a hurry. Oriental markets usually have a couple of brands, and it's available in regular and hot. It's fine on a burger although I don't go there because that's Heinz's sweet spot. When I make my annual old fashioned meat loaf, I glaze the top with it. It makes an awesome base for BBQ sauce, which is how I usually use it. A particularly excellent version blends it with coffee: combine 1 cup of it along with 1/2 cup each of cider vinegar, brown sugar, and strong coffee. Simmer this with an onion, a couple cloves of garlic, 2-4 jalapeños, and 2 tablespoons of dry mustard. Puree in a blender, and then use on pork loin or chops, or on chicken wings.